


Post Feelings

by ItFlare



Series: What Happens After (and Sometimes Before) [2]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Blindshipping, Cuddling, M/M, Pharaoh Lives, Puzzleshipping, Separation Anxiety, Sharing a Bed, protective atem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-07-05 16:43:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15867627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItFlare/pseuds/ItFlare
Summary: Atems gaze is soft towards his partner. All sharp edges and monarchical need to keep face are gone. He’s worried. Concerned. This isn’t a bully or threat he can scare off with his anger and dark punishments. But he'll be there.No. Matter. What.Forever. And even after that.--Yugi deals with anxiety after coming home from Egypt.





	Post Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> ib = heart  
> ibib = beloved/ heart of my heart  
> Duat = the after life/ realm of the dead

Yugi’s skin is sunkissed.

 

Slightly burnt. A darker color with a pink hue rests across the bridge of his nose and apples of his cheeks drying the skin slightly. In some places it looks like a healthy flush. On the very tops of his cheeks, right under his eyes, it's more of an embarrassed glow. His shoulders have the worst of it. They’re red and turn pale when pressed upon. The skin is warm, growing cooler as fingers trail lightly down his arm. Dark hair is barely a shade lighter thanks to the unforgiving intensity of the Egyptian sun. 

 

These are just a few of the things Atem notices through the dim lighting. A small night light sits across the room casting a dull yellow glow on his sleeping partner. Yugi is turned slightly with his back against the wall with one arm curled inward towards his chest. His hand is in a fist, slender fingers clasped where the puzzle should be. The slow rise and fall of his chest is peaceful, as are his slightly parted lips. Yugi’s bottom lip is rounded and sticks out when he unintentionally pouts. Atem wants to touch it. And now he  _ can _ .

 

The skin is as soft as it looks. It’s slightly chapped toward the inside of his partners mouth. Atem oh-so- _ slowly _ runs his thumb across the plush pout. The skin presses inward under the pressure and warm puffs of air ghost over his thumb.

 

The sensation is foreign.  _ New again _ .

 

Atem is so grateful to be alive.

 

The pharaoh is pulled from his thoughts when the tip of his partners tongue swipes against his finger. The action causes him to freeze, goosebumps cover his skin and wine colored eyes widen in the darkness. 

 

Yugi's eyebrows draw together as he turns his head into the pillow. His body curls inward pressing closer to the other man in his small bed. Atems hand stays frozen in place until his young partners face relaxes. Yugi licks his lips once before he stills. 

 

Atems heart beats faster at the sight in front of him. The fresh memory of Yugi's warm tongue against his fingertip makes his cheeks flush.

 

It had felt so  _ private. _ Lewd almost, yet innocent in a way only his partner could convey.

 

He’s shaken by it.

 

It’s been a  _ very _ long time since he’s felt anything like this. But it's different this time. Deeper. Less physical. There's no chain of command or superiority to hold over his partners head. No obligation to please the pharaoh.

 

It's better this way.

 

_ He  _ **_cares_ ** _ more this way. _

 

Atems not sure how to react.

 

So he doesn’t.

 

Atem stays awake after that. His heart is beating too fast and his skin feels so  _ alive _ in the dead of night. He watches as Yugi sleeps on until his eyes become sleep heavy and unable to focus any further. The Pharaoh caresses his young partners cheek one last time before he lays his head down on the pillow and quickly falls into a dreamless sleep.

 

\--

 

The next day it's Yugi that finds himself lost in the sight of his other half.

 

Flesh and blood, as clear as day, healthy and so very  _ alive. _

 

_ How could he ever be so lucky? _

 

_ How could he continue to live on if he were not? _

 

The thought plants something cold in the younger males chest. Sudden anxiety begins to race through his veins.

 

_ I could have lost you. _

 

It's terrifying.

 

Atem sits next to him on the floor of his-  _ their  _ bedroom thumbing through the pictures on Yugi's smartphone. The Pharaoh is amazed and curious about modern technology. He was there when all of these pictures were taken. He’d been in control during some of their group selfies but it feels as if he's seeing them for the first time. A poorly timed selfie taken by Joey and Tristan causes Atem to let out a huff of laughter.

 

The sound takes Yugi's breath away.

 

It's beautiful. Possibly Yugi’s new favorite thing. 

 

They're sitting side by side against the bed. Their legs touch and their arms bump against each other constantly. The room is almost silent, Atem is lost in what he’s doing. Yugi is grateful for the comforting quiet. Everything had been so  _ loud  _ lately. He thinks that the years of running and constantly being on guard are finally catching up to him. It doesn’t help that his greatest dream has somehow come true. As greatful as he is, he is still completely and utterly overwhelmed. It's only their first day home and part of him was expecting to wake up alone to a deafening silence.

 

The missing weight around his neck is a firm reminder of what could have been. It causes an ache to form in his chest. 

 

Yugi’s hands tremble in his lap.

 

He fears the brief moments of blindness that come with every blink. Maybe this time when he opens his eyes the pharaoh won't be there anymore. This gift could be taken at any moment. Replaced with a deeper loneliness than any he’d ever felt before. Yugi's not sure how or why the pharaoh had been given his life back, that was between him and the gods, but he can’t help but worry that it had been finite. The desert sand running quickly through the spaces between his fingers.

 

Would Atem tell him if there were a time limit? A clause?  _ Anything? _ Are these moments slowly crumbling away to nothing? Would Atem tell him if they were? 

 

He shudders, face growing pale at the thought of losing his other half. Yugi’s throat clenches shut as he tries to swallow down his bad feelings. His hands go to where the puzzle should be only to meet with his wrinkled tank top. Yugi grabs the fabric, trying to tether himself to the less grim reality they’d been presented with. The worst hadn’t happened so why was he-

 

“Partner?”

 

Atems deep baritone breaks through the thick panic taking hold of Yugi.

 

Yugi’s body freezes, head snapping to the side. His cellphone sits on the floor in front of them and Atems body is turned toward him, hand raised toward Yugi as if it were interrupted before making contact with his arm. The pharaohs brows are drawn in concern and a slight frown graces his regal features. Guilt blooms in Yugi's stomach, pulling his lips down even further.

 

“Partner, what is the matter?”

 

The concern in his voice makes Yugi feel even worse. Instead of answering he bites his lip in fear of upsetting his other half any further. Somewhere deep inside he worries that admitting his fears may bring them to life. As if opening his mouth would break the spell keeping Atem in the physical world.

 

Atem leans in toward his charge. He places a careful hand on Yugi's arm as he waits for an answer. Moments pass and the silence grows solid and thick between them. Atem can feel the fear and sadness radiating from his other half. He knows his partner has always been full of emotion but the suddenness of it all surprises him. The lack of response also leaves him on edge. They’ve never held any secrets between them. Would they start now? 

 

“Please, Yugi.. Speak to me.”

 

His other half stays silent. Their faces are inches apart. Yugi looks up at his sun, doe eyed and vulnerable. Atem watches as Yugi's eyes grow damp and heavy with tears that stick to his lashes before rolling down his burnt cheeks. Atems heart breaks at the sight. 

 

“ _ Ibib..”  _ the pharaoh pleads in his native tongue. Atem moves to cradle his other halfs face in his hands. Yugi's face crumples immediately.

 

“I could have lost you.” he sobs, “I could have lost you and it would have been my fault.”

 

Atem immediately pulls Yugi into his chest with enough exertion to force a grasp from his partner. He squeezes his other half and runs a hand down his back then back up into his hair. Yugi cried openly into the pharaohs chest. His sobs are quick and leave his body as if they were punched out. He grabs Atems shirt in desperation, anything to assure him of the pharaohs physical form.

 

They stay like that, with Yugi's wet face buried in Atems chest, long enough for Yugi’s panicked sobs to subside. Atem continues to hold him. The pharaohs tanned arms are strong and protective. A safetynet. 

 

Atems face is buried in Yugi's untamable hair. He inhales deeply and subtly presses his lips to the crown of his partners head.

 

Minutes pass before either of them are ready to speak. Atem does his best to hold himself together. Seeing his partner in such a state shakes him to the core. He feels terrible for not bringing this up sooner. Atem takes a moment to collect himself before giving one last squeeze to the shaking boy in his arms. Yugi lets out a noise of surprise as Atem pulls away. Atem quiets him by cradling his cheek with a sun kissed hand. He rubs his thumb gently against his partners cheek and wipes away a heavy tear. Jerky sniffles still make Yugi's breath hitch but the mournful sobs have quieted for now. Atem thumbs a fresh tear away before speaking.

 

“Partner..  _ Ibib _ . You are not at fault for any calamity. You did as you were asked.”

 

“But-”

 

Atem silences him with his hand.

 

“You set me free, Yugi.. You set me free and here I am holding you in my arms. I get a second chance at life and I get to experience this new world with  _ you.  _ What more could I ever ask for?”

 

Instead of the small smile Atem was hoping for he was met with a wave of tears.

 

“But what if- How do you-” Yugi's voice is thick as he stumbles over his words. He takes a deep breath. “How do I know you're here? That you’ll stay?”

 

Atem pulls back slightly in shock.

 

“I would never leave you!” he assures with resolve “You are my  _ ibib _ , my  _ ib,  _ my other half. I will stay by your side for as long as you’ll have me.”

 

Yugi's bottom lip wobbles with uncertainty “Please...” he pleads, “Don’t ever leave again.”  The pharaoh presses their foreheads together with both hands holding his partners flushed face. Their noses touch. The closeness makes Yugi's heart race.

 

_ “Never.” _

 

A promise.

 

“But what if…” 

 

Atem pulls away to see his partners face. He waits patiently for Yugi to continue. Yugi swallows before speaking.

 

“What if the gods call you back?”

 

“They won’t.”

 

“You promise?”

 

The smile on Atems face warms Yugi's heart.

 

“On my life and my kingdom. I will never leave you. This I swear. Neither life nor death could take me away from you. As long a you walk this earth I will walk beside you. And when the day comes for you to enter  _ Duat  _ I shall as well and experience the afterlife by your side.”

 

The admission is final. Yugi lets out a slow breath. It's quiet again. With eyes glued to each other they mull over what's been said. Atems gaze is soft towards his partner. All sharp edges and monarchical need to keep face are gone. He’s worried. Concerned. This isn’t a bully or threat he can scare off with his anger and dark punishments. This will take time. Atem kicks himself for being so surprised by it. 

 

Yugi feels completely vulnerable. Atems affirmation is soul heavy and from the heart. Yugi can’t help but believe him. He’s not sure what happened after the decorated doors in the tomb closed and he feels that maybe he's not supposed to. But Atem  _ promised. _ That  _ has _ to mean something. And it does. He knows it does. 

 

“So as long as I’m around you will be to?”

 

Pharoah nods “If that is what you wish, then yes.”

 

“I.. I do- Yes!” Yugi's cheeks are filled with heat. He feels that he’s just admitted something the pharaoh probably already knew.

 

Atem tries to hide his laughter 

 

“I know.” the monarch comforts. Yugi's exuberance is infectious. “You never need to worry about my presence being absent from your side.” He looks away and Yugi smiles at his other halfs embarrassment “I don’t think I could stray too far even if I wanted to.”

 

Yugi gets it. All too much. He understands. 

 

“I believe you.. I really do. It's just…”

 

The left remains unsaid. Atem knows. His partner has always battled silent anxieties. This is not the first time this has happened. 

 

They move back to the bed at Atems request. He’s tired and he knows his partner is still reeling from the past few weeks. They sit silently together in the same way they would have before. Except now there's more. _ So much more. _ And it's good. In Atems eyes things are as they should be. He gets to watch as his other half falls asleep again, but this time in his arms breathing against  _ his skin  _ and he  _ feels it.  _ It leaves him euphoric.

 

He knows Yugi's fears will come back as they have in the past. It is has not been abnormal for him to come out to comfort his anxious charge. But now he knows he’ll be there. Actually  _ be there _ in a way he hasn’t been able to in the past. 

 

“We’ll be okay.” he whispers as he caresses Yugi’s cheek in the same way he had the night before “I promise. Everything is going to be okay.”

 

And it will be. He’ll make sure of it.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a bit unsure about this one.
> 
> I always felt that Yugi would have a bit of PTSD after everything that went on and it would probably hit him after things calmed down.  
> Protective Item keeps me alive. What a guy. I wanted more puzzle shipping in the world so I made some.
> 
> Now that I'm not in school I'm trying to relearn that output does not equal self worth. Its been a journey to say the least. Please stick with me as I figure it out. Also, I might make a writing twitter?? I'm not sure if I should post my other art and animations on it as well. tbh I'm not really sure about anything atm. I'm in a weird season of transition.
> 
> Thank you all for reading!! All comments, kudos and views are deeply appreciated.  
> Hope to see you all again soon!


End file.
